Double figures. Perhaps because nine months was SO hard, Emma's ten month day is passing far more gently than expected. Perhaps it's because it's the long summer holiday and I have my other two and D. here with me so there isn't silence where there should be a whirlwind of infant activity. Perhaps it's because the past few weeks have been very hard and at some point I had to climb back out of the pit for a breath.
I still wish I could have known her at ten months - my other two were earlyish walkers (11&10 months) so perhaps she'd be cruising around the furniture. 6YO is building an elaborate wooden traintrack - I'm quite sure she'd be tasting the trains and messing up the design.
I wish.
Miss you sweet little girl.
11 comments:
When I try to imagine Emma, I think of her in these terms: She is a little part of me and you but also would have been shaped by B and L. I take the best from all four of us and that becomes my poppet. So yes, she would be tasting a train layout but she would have a smile to steal your heart; her eyes would light up as you come into the room and her giggle would be priceless, loving affection (just like her big brother and sister).
Love you Jilly
D
And we miss her with you, Jill. Today and always.
I do that too ... try to imagine what would have been like at this age. Makes me smile and teary at the same time.
It's so hard not to think of all the milestones that our babies should be hitting, especially because so many awesome changes happen in the first year. I too am ten months out from losing my Peyton, and find myself seeing other kids around that age and thinking would she do that... or that... or that. Somehow it amplifies the feelings of being robbed. I am happy to hear that ten months is going easier on you than nine had. Isnt it funny the ebb and flow of these emotions, and how some days just hurt so much more than others though the loss is the same. thinking of you
Funny how time just keeps going, isn't it? Thinking of you and Emma today and always Jill.
I'm so glad that this month is being gentle on you. I think of what Leila would be doing too, all of the time, now and in the future. i have this little fantasies about her and they bring a smile to my face, but then i always end up crying and depressed cuz i know she'll never do any of the things i imagine.
i wish Emma was around to mess up those tracks. <3
much love,
christy
Thinking of you and your little Emma today. I don't know when it gets easier, at this point I dont think it ever will. Be gentle with yourself my friend.
It's weird how somedays it seems easier than others and how you never know when those days will be...remembering with you, always.
Ooo, I bet that elaborate traintrack wouldn't have lasted ten minutes untasted or unmessed. I wish that Emma was here to drive her older siblings wild.
I'm glad that it was a peaceful day for you. Remembering sweet Emma. xx
I wish too Jill. Thinking of you x
I also wish that you could know Emma today. Thinking of you and Emma.
Post a Comment